Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Should we ever meet, don’t ask . . .?

In a bit of a mood today. Not a bad mood, just the kind of mood that promotes total randomness. Which got me thinking, what shall I say to people I meet at the conferences this summer? And should I give them some warning that my answers might sound like I’m not all there? (Because I might not be—answers will probably be worse if you find me in the bar! <eg>)

Well, my answer to myself was yes. So here’s my warning: I claim no responsibility for what I may blurt out. I’m an author, I’m allowed to be weird! ;)

Here’s some of the questions I figured I might be asked, along with my possible answers. All replied with love! <3

Q: Oh, you’re an author?! What do you write?

Answer: Self-help books. All about how to help yourself to a hot hockey player. My former books are about how to handle seven men and/or enjoy captivity and torture.

Q: Can you name one of your books?

Answer: Harry Potter, Pride and Prejudice, War and Peace, and . . .
Oh, the books I’ve written! *blush* Here, have a bookmark.

Q: Do you have kids? That’s amazing! How do you do it?

Answer: The making of a child is described in full in all my self-help books.

Q: No! How do you raise kids and write books?

Answer: Duct tape.

Q: How do you write such hot sex scenes? Have you experienced everything you write about?

Answer: Absolutely. I write them so well because I’m a sex addict. It annoys the men when I stop midclimax to take notes, but I’m very dedicated to my job.

Q: When is the next in (insert series) coming out?

Answer: *using amazing godlike author powers, pulls out laptop and types 100k word in 60 seconds* As soon as I click publish! <g>

Q: You must have gained so much success after Fifty Shades came out! Don’t you love that book?!

Answer: *smiles and orders another drink* Fifty who?

I’m sure there will be many more questions, but these are the ones that have occurred to me so far. Feel free to leave more in the comments! I need to be prepared! ;)

*note* Just having a bit of fun, so I hope no one takes offense. I really do love answering questions, but I can be a bit of a tease! Take me with a grain of salt and a slice of lime. First shots on me! xoxo