Monday, October 29, 2012

Do not read reviews. EVER. Unless you're ready to admit you cannot ignore the value of the TOP 5

Why would any author beyond the most green even consider clicking on a review? And worse, what kind of masochist would click on a one or two star review? That’s like asking someone to attach a ‘Kick Me’ sign to your back. With several staples.

Well, I’ve cut my review reading tendencies down to almost nothing. I rarely even read good reviews—which is a lot harder—and while I understand the importance of reviews, I’ve come to terms with the fact that reviews. ARE. NOT. FOR. AUTHORS. Some people may say you can learn from reviews. I guess some new authors might be able to—if they haven’t found much more productive places to learn from such as crit groups, workshops, etc. Seriously, an author is much more likely to damage their fragile egos (VERY fragile in most cases) than learn anything. And the authors with egos too big to damage don’t G.A.S about reviews.

But sometimes it’s tempting to take a peek. You’re sitting at your desk, staring at that evil blank page, wishing the words would march across it like little soldier ants and prove that your abilities haven’t been sucked into the huge black hole that swallows creativity while the interactive world online passes you by. It won’t hurt to check out who’s on facebook. Nothing much going on? How about twitter? While you’re online you might as well check your stats. It’s very important that you know what they are at any given time of day. And the rush of seeing the numbers going down a few thousand is so worth it! You now know people are buying your books! Reading them! Maybe even….enjoying them?

How can you know? Because you must know! It’s kinda like the feeling you get when you leave your baby with someone for the first time. You’re tempted to call again and again to see how the baby is doing. You can’t let go.

But you have to. Or so they say.

What happens if you can’t? Well, you could end up with a very clingy kid and not much grownup time. When it comes to books, you could end up spending more time obsessing over what a handful of readers thought of your past books than writing new ones. And if you’ve written a book that draws those one-two shots, you can actually put yourself into a depression. Not very productive.

Or you can find a new way to look at it. Now, this isn’t a criticism against reviewers in general. Everyone has their own opinion and you are entitled to yours even if it’s hurtful to the author. This is just to help a few sensitive souls get some perspective on some of the ‘constructive criticism’ commonly found in harsh reviews.

Here are the top five worst things to read in a review, and what authors should really be thinking when they read them.

5. I HATED the characters. (or) I couldn’t relate to the hero/heroine.

This is unfortunate. Ideally, every single reader who picks up your book will love your characters. Ideally every person in the world will love you. We’d all live in a beautiful utopia and spend our days hugging. Maybe groping. Mega-orgies!

No matter how likeable your characters are, someone’s not going to ‘get them’. For example, if your heroine is obsessed with cooking, I’ll probably hate her. Which you should absolutely change once you read my review, right? ;) 

4. This book was a struggle to read! Too slow to start (or fast paced, or descriptive, or not descriptive enough—insert issue) and I just couldn’t get into it.

Of course, a comment like this means you have to change your writing style. That beautiful prose that paints every scene should be removed. Those action scenes that grip the reader need to be restructured. Actually, you should do a survey of a hundred readers to see what style they like best and spend a few days compiling the information so you can write in a way that pleases them all.

And good luck with that!

3. This book disappointed me. I thought it would be just like (insert current trendsetter…or save yourself some time and insert 50 Shades).

Hmm…well, this one is harder to explain. Because really, why didn’t you write 50 Shades? Please set aside some time each day to contemplate this and amend your ways as quickly as possible. And if you can’t emulate the New York Bestseller, you should probably stop writing. That’s all anyone wants to read right now.

**Note: To be successful with this, please ignore all the reviews from readers that tell you they love your book because it’s different. They are misguided.

2. DNF, but I would like to say…

Pay careful attention to these. Often they have questions that were never answered, and you really should dwell on the fact that you didn’t answer those questions earlier. Also, how dare you lose the interest of the reader! Really, you should have included hash brownies with the purchase. Or some chemical in the paper of the b…ah, yeah. No paper. Damn ebooks!

**Note: Contact ereader distributors and suggest a method of chemically enticing every reader who begins a book to finish it. Because no book was ever not finished until the evil ebook came along.

1. Worst book ever.

Okay, stop right there. This isn’t a criticism! Well, unless the reviewer hasn’t read many books, in which case their opinion may be suspect. You have somehow managed to move beyond the hundreds of books that strive for the title, impassioned the reader enough for them to make a very lofty claim about what they’ve just read. But don’t let it get to your head. Your books may be close to reaching notoriety, but they’re not there yet. If only one person says this, it may be a glitch. If many say it…

Well, I have to admit, I’ve let it get to my head a little. I’m very close to claiming that infamous title for one of my books which has gained almost as much hate as it has love. If you plan to take the title from me, you’ve got your work cut out for you. You best have written something truly horrific!

If you’ve never been handed out one of these gems in a review, don’t worry. Keep working hard and it will come. And if you’ve gotten to the point where you haven’t been reading reviews in a while, you may already have one. But don’t go checking!

All right, but just a little peek! ;)

Friday, October 5, 2012


This is going to be a really quick post because release days are always a little crazy and I come unprepared! lol! All I have for you is an incredibly sexy scene which needs a great big:

But first, I thought I should tell you a little about my plans for the next week. And take the opportunity to pick your brains! First of all, tonight I will be hosting a chat tonight RELEASE DAY CHAT WITH BIANCA SOMMERLAND so swing by to celebrate with me! There will be THREE prizes offered to chatters chosen at random! Don't miss it! :)

Also, starting October 7th, the Cobras will be going on a tour, and what I'd like to know is who are you dying to spend time with? There will be 6 stops:

10/7 ~ Under the Covers
10/8 ~ Guilty Pleasures
10/9 ~ Kinky Book Reviews
10/10 ~ RomFan
10/11 ~ Author Alannah Lynne
10/12 ~ Cocktails and Books

Obviously, since it is their book. Luke, Sebastian, and Jami will each make a stop, but that leaves 2 spots open. So I'm going to let you choose. And as an added bonus, I'm going to be giving away a special prize donated by the Cobras to the two commenters who make the best case for their favorite player!

Now I'll share the blurb and the excerpt. Scroll to the bottom for buy links and don't forget to comments for your chance to win!

 Blurb: Against some attacks, the only hope is to come out and meet the play.

Last year, Jami Richter had no plans, no goals, no future. But that’s all changed. First step, make up for putting her father through hell by supporting the hockey team he manages and becoming an Ice Girl. But a photo shoot puts her right in the arms of Sebastian Ramos, a Dartmouth Cobra defenseman with a reputation for getting any woman—or, as the rumours imply, man—he desires. And the powerful dominant wants her…and Luke. Getting involved in Seb’s lifestyle gives her a new understanding of the game and the bonds between players. But can she handle being caught between two men who want her, while struggling with their attraction to one another?

Luke Carter’s life is about as messed up as his scarred face. His mother is sick. His girlfriend dumps him. When he goes to his favorite BDSM club to blow off some steam, his Dom status is turned upside down when a therapeutic beating puts him in a good place. He flatly denies being submissive--or, even worse, being attracted to another man. He wants Jami but can’t have her without getting involved with Sebastian. Can he overcome his own prejudices long enough to admit he wants them both?

Caught between Luke and Jami, Sebastian Ramos does everything in his power to fulfill their needs. His two new submissives willingly share their bodies, but not their secrets. When his own past comes back to haunt him, the fragile foundation of their relationship is ripped apart. As he works to salvage the damage done by doubt and insecurity, he discovers that Jami is hiding something dangerous. But it may already be too late.


This ebook contains material not suitable for readers under 18. It also contains scenes that some may find objectionable, including hockey violence, BDSM, ménage sex, bondage, anal sex, sex toys, multiple partners, woman love, and man love including, but not limited to an erotic shower scene. Readers are advised not to attempt reenacting the scene while reading the ebook.


The glass dildo she'd bought earlier that day sat on the bed behind her, disinfected and ready to use. She picked it up and ran her fingers over the wide head, then down the pale blue winding ridges. Sebastian had told her to pick one that matched him in size, but she must have overcompensated. If Sebastian was this big, he never would have fit inside her.

"I showed it to you, right?" She tongued her bottom lip. "It's pretty big."
"I can see that." The edge of Sebastian's lip twitched. He reached into the shower where Luke stood under the spray and ran his hand from the nape of Luke's neck to the small of his back. "But it will be the only thing to fill you until I am with you again. Try it, Jami. If it hurts too much then I will buy you another."
"Yes, mi Rey." She scooted backwards on the bed and opened her legs. Then she stroked the cool, smooth glass head of the dildo between her folds. Her eyes fluttered shut as arousal flared deep in her core. She forced them open and moaned at the sight of Sebastian stripping, of him stepping into the shower to pull Luke, dripping wet, into his arms. They kissed, slower than before, with Sebastian easing off several times and speaking quietly to Luke when it looked like he was trying to rush things.
Jami had a hard time paying any attention to the glass dildo, growing warm with her body heat. She stared as Luke clasped his hands behind his neck and closed his eyes. He swallowed, nodded, and let Sebastian guide him down to his knees.
Her lips parted as Luke's did. Her mouth went dry as Sebastian took hold of his dick with one hand, put the other hand on the back of Luke's head, and eased him forward.
"That's it, semental. Very good." The muscles in Sebastian's forearms and stomach hardened, as if it took all his strength not to thrust it. "Circle the top with your tongue. And breathe. Yes. Now open wider."
Inch by inch, Sebastian's dick disappeared into Luke's mouth. He stopped with about half his length inside and drew out.
"More this time. Use your lips with the same pressure you enjoy Jami or I using on you."
 A rough sound came from Luke as his lips glided over and over the slick, flesh, as he accepted more and more. Sebastian groaned and began to fuck Luke's face at a faster pace. His balls bumped Luke's chin and he rasped in a harsh breath. Held Luke in place with his cock stuffed in his mouth.
"I love the way you look like this, niño. On your knees, sucking my dick. I could fuck your hot mouth all night." Sebastian slid out and pulled Luke to his feet. "But I'd rather fuck you."
"Oh God!" Luke shook as Sebastian turned him to face the wall which had the cuffs on suction cups stuck to it. "God, I'm gonna come!"
"Not yet." Sebastian reached around and fisted his hand around the base of Luke's cock and squeezed. "I won't help you next time. Calm yourself. You may come when I am inside you."
Luke's jaw hardened. He nodded and positioned his hands so Sebastian could attach the cuffs.
Once Luke was restrained, Sebastian stepped out of the bath to retrieve something from the counter. He glanced over at Jami as he held up the lube and squirted some into his palm. "We will be watching you now Jami. Stretch yourself open with that glass dildo as I stretch him. Match my pace."
"Okay." Jami held the glass dildo against her slit as Sebastian stepped behind Luke. She was so wet that half the head slid easily inside her as she watched Sebastian push one lubed finger into Luke's ass. She worked the tip in and out, panting as Sebastian's thick finger sank in all the way.
"Push back against me, niño," Sebastian said as he added a second finger. "Yes. Yes, just like that."
"Fuck that feels . . . almost too good. Ah!" Luke bowed his head and gasped as Sebastian pumped his fingers in and out. "Please! Please . . . ."
Sebastian combed his fingers into Luke's hair and jerked his head back. His tone was rough with passion. "Tell me what you want me to do."
"Fuck me, Sir!" Luke rasped out. He twisted his head slightly and looked at Jami. "I need you to fuck me now!"
 Jami whimpered as she pushed the dildo in deeper. It felt uncomfortably big. And she was so desperate to be full.
But then Sebastian latched onto Luke's hip with one hand and used the other to aim his dick to where his fingers had been. He rocked his hips forward and she shoved the dildo, crying out as it impaled her and her core rippled around it with a violent orgasm. She had to hold the end to keep her body from pushing it out. Her thighs quivered with the sensation, like an electric bolt striking the same spot, over and over. Red spots filled her vision, but she could still make Sebastian out, on the screen, watching her.
He held still for a moment. Then made Luke bend over a little more.
She held her breath as he thrust in.